"Sorry for your fender,"

...and other moose-death stories.
then you should probably ditch that sweater…

then you should probably ditch that sweater…

(Source: thingsilearnedfromsatc)

oh my god i remember these!

oh my god i remember these!

(Source: imremembering, via shlabam)


My banana looks like Matt Smith

My banana looks like Matt Smith

(Source: vvargs, via shlabam)

Don’t toy with the copy editor.

“Those guys were literally packing.” -coworker 

“So they each had suitcases?” -me

(Source: elenamarijalisa)

me: we've got optimal bonding time
alison: how much more bonding do we need
alison: haven't we done enough
love.

love.

(Source: dagasa, via take1xtie1xday)

holy shit. 

I’ve spent the past hour googling my high school classmates with the word “arrest” next to their names.  Breaking and entering.  Assault and battery.  Possession of class A and B substances. Prostitution. Larceny. Endangering a minor.  Drunk driving (resulting in a car wreck that lost the driver half of her hand.  I can’t find details on who/what she hit.)

The girl on the top and the bottom right?  She (along with four other people) was arrested for beating a mentally handicapped man bloody.  She was a personal friend of mine in high school.  Definitely a little bit wild with some behavioral problems, but I thought she was a good kid.

The girl on the left, well, she posted that as her public facebook photo, so I figure it’s okay to share it.  I was -almost- obsessed with her in high school—she half-shaved her head, dyed her hair purple and wore crazy clothes.  She listened to Marilyn Manson and seemed tough, but funny.  I hung out with her once.  I probably talked about it afterwards all the time like I was cool for a day.

I’m pretty shocked at the percentage of names I can google that will return newspaper articles about their arrests.  I wish I had a yearbook so I could do this properly.

I guess maybe, -maybe- it’s a good thing my parents yanked me out of Boston when they did. I always see it as them ruining my television career and forcing me to NOT apply at Emerson, but…maybe I wouldn’t have turned out so hot if I stayed. Maybe I didn’t really have any decent role models. Not sure that I had any here either, but at least I can’t rattle off all the people in my graduating class who are junkies/etc.

Yikes.

Do me a favor this morning. Draw the curtain and come back to bed.
Forget the coffee. We’ll pretend
we’re in a foreign country, and in love.

“The Road” by Raymond Carver, from Where Water Comes Together With Other Water (via rainydaysandblankets)

(Source: marikoyama, via take1xtie1xday)